FAQs
“It is not uncommon for people to come to the session and be unsure about what they want to discuss,” says Jessica Small, licensed marriage and family therapist. Opening up is tough and may not come easily, especially when just getting to know your therapist.
What to say at the start of therapy? ›
In your first therapy sessions, you'll talk about your reasons for coming to therapy. You'll talk about what's been going on in your life that is painful, difficult, or at least not working as well as you'd like. You'll talk about things you want to change and any goals you might have.
Why doesn't my therapist say anything? ›
They see their job as helping you find your own answers, and they know that silence can help you do that. Sitting in silence allows a lot of things to rise up inside you—thoughts, feelings, and memories you might not normally experience. And that is what your therapist is hoping you'll talk about.
Is there anything you shouldn't tell your therapist? ›
So, among the very few things we would say you shouldn't tell your therapist are the chatty details of your day. Avoid the safe subjects you don't have any big feelings or deep thoughts about and the conversation topics you use to put others at ease in casual social situations.
What do therapists notice about their clients? ›
They notice patterns in how your relationships play out and themes in what makes you feel anxious or stuck. They might not tell you what they're noticing right away, but that's probably because they're not sure they've got it right yet. Ultimately, your therapist doesn't want to keep you in the dark.
What is the first thing a therapist says? ›
During the first session, your therapist may ask you: What are your symptoms? What brought you to therapy? What do you feel is wrong in your life?
What won't your psychiatrist tell you? ›
In some situations, therapists won't provide a diagnosis because they don't think it's essential to the recovery process. Many professionals believe that labels can cause clients to concentrate on the wrong aspects of their mental health condition.
How to tell your therapist you're struggling? ›
Communicate openly and be honest.
You don't have to tell your therapist every secret you've ever kept, but you do need to share everything relevant to the themes you're exploring and the goals you're trying to achieve.
What do you say at the end of therapy? ›
Acknowledge enjoyment in working together, and express some of the therapist's feelings about ending the relationship. Discuss the future and the potential for returning to therapy if required. Discuss the tools now available to the client and how to use them going forward.
How do therapists start a session? ›
Greet the client with a smile and, if you feel comfortable, small talk, but keep it very brief. They may have something big on their mind they want to discuss, so avoid distractions by keeping it light and simple.
Whether therapist's demonstrate their emotions outward or not, I have no doubt they feel with you. They feel your sadness, they feel the joy at your successes and they also feel righteous anger for you. Your therapist is likely more alongside you in your journey to healing than you know.
What are therapist red flags? ›
Therapist Red Flags
They don't listen to you and/or they interrupt you. They have their own goals and expectations for your treatment and aren't open to hearing yours. They display unethical behaviors, sketchy boundaries, or disregard confidentiality protocols.
What should a therapist never say to a client? ›
Give unsolicited advice. Contrary to popular belief, a good therapist will never tell you how you should live your life. They won't tell you how to treat your family members, to break up with a toxic spouse, or what hobbies to take up.
Why does my therapist just stare at me? ›
Therapists keep a close eye on you because: It helps them take in not just the content of what you're saying, but how you're saying it, your body language, and other subtle cues. Eye contact is one of many active listening skills that help them listen to you more deeply and show you they're fully present.
What to say when you don't know what to say as a therapist? ›
You might say something like, “It sounds like this is really difficult for you, and I can understand why you feel that way.” Let your clients know you see what they are going through and that it makes sense why they feel the way they do.
Why do I struggle to talk in therapy? ›
You're protecting yourself.
Maybe you're feeling embarrassed or ashamed. Try telling your therapist that it's hard to talk to them because you feel weird that you told them so much in a previous session. A good therapist will validate these feelings and support you in expressing them.
What is the I don't know response in therapy? ›
“I don't know” meaning “I really don't know. I will need to give that some thought.” In this instance, patients generally have not consciously thought about their answer to the question. Their intention is to communicate that they will give thought to the topic and perhaps return to it at a later date.
Why do I feel like I have nothing to say to my therapist? ›
Why Is There Nothing To Say? Struggling to maintain a conversation during a therapy session can be the result of many things. It could come from a place of contentment, feelings of rage, anxiety—there's no single cause behind a moment of quiet. Often, a quiet therapy session can be the result of a quiet week.
